The other night I was sitting in my pjs, scrolling through streaming services with my mouth stuffed with cheese and crackers and in need of a good doco to get lost.
I came across The Ashley Madison Affair on Disney+ and it looked pretty juicy, so I started playing. Of course, we all know cheating is happening all around us, it’s nothing new.
But it was something much more insane that really caught my attention.
It made me realize that people are so desperate to cheat that even the famous Ashley Madison leak couldn’t stop them. Seriously, despite 32 million people being named and shamed for their cheating ways, the website is still going. In fact, it’s prosperity!
Johna Hawking is constantly shocked at how many people are actually cheating
What the real f**k? Millions of people are logging in every day, leaving their credit cards and personal details on file despite the enormous risk that they might be publicly outed.
The risks they take can result in divorces, families torn apart, and judgments they’ve never experienced before… and yet… they move on.
I asked who would be stupid enough to do something like that until I took a good look around my own group of friends, and if I was being completely honest.
We have all played with fire. Actually, it was pretty exciting, well, until it wasn’t. Then it was worse. Very very bad.
Let me share with you a story that I was too hesitant to reveal before, but hopefully my bad decision will stop you from making yours.
In my early twenties I probably did one of the most selfish, reckless and thrilling things of my life. I’m going to keep it a little vague so as not to ‘out’ the person but share all the details with you.
I got my first job in media and everything was still fresh and exciting. I was socializing with people I only saw on TV. It’s safe to say I drank the Kool-Aid and got swept up in all its glitz and glamour.
I found myself at a fairly important awards night after party, and I was in my element. I had a couple of champagne with my work colleagues when suddenly a soap-star I was crushed on my teenage saunters. He starts chatting with me and I can’t get enough of it.
Now of course I knew he was married, but as I said, I was in my early twenties and very naive about the consequences of my following actions.
We took the party upstairs to his hotel room and it was the kind of night I had imagined in my super-horny teenage years.
The next morning, I slipped back into my sequined gown from the night before, laced up my high heels and headed out of the tipi-pai room on a mission to find my room which was across the lobby (shockingly). The lobby I’m talking about was currently occupied by a TV breakfast show who were doing a live show the morning after the big awards.
So yes, I was the girl you see in the back of the TV shot still making her way through the lobby in her sparkly dress from the night before. It was probably the most embarrassing walk-of-shame of my life.
I told a couple of my close girlfriends about my night of debauchery and then went on with my life. Like I said, young, naive and I had absolutely no idea of the karma coming my way.
She admits to expressing her anger when she looks within her own friendship groups and even into her past.
Fast forward a few months and I’m all dressed up, and on a first date with possibly the hottest guy I’ve ever met. I’m on a high as we both go to the bar to order some drinks. I see this woman staring at me but brush it off because I’m too busy trying to impress this guy.
We order drinks and head to the back of the room where we’ve secured some seats. As we make our way, I feel someone grab my hand a little tighter. It’s the lady from the bar. He says, ‘Hi Jana, do you recognize me?’ I’m not telling the truth. I tell him ‘I’m so sorry but have we met before? I have a tragic memory.’ The next words out of his mouth literally stopped me in my tracks.
She says, ‘No we haven’t met before, but you have met my husband’ and she points to the corner of a bar where the guy from the awards night is standing looking white as a ghost.
In a moment of panic, and my date looking really confused, I tell her ‘no sorry, I’ve never met her’ and try to leave. He yells something at me but I’m busy going back to our seats to collect my things.
My bad date follows me, and I explain that we have to leave now! I tell him I’ll explain once we’re out the door and thankfully he doesn’t ask any questions and just follows me.
As I walk towards the front door which seems like a million miles away (but realistically about 20 meters) I see her walking towards the same door with her husband in hand. Oh god.
The socialite remembers a one-night stand with a soap star
We meet right at the door, and he stands in front, blocking my path. I went back to my date and told him to go to the security guard because I honestly thought he was going to punch me. Which, to be fair I probably deserved.
She starts yelling at me ‘I know you **ked my husband’ everyone is looking, and my date is frantically calling a security guard. She turned to her husband and said ‘Tell him!’ ‘You’re the worst decision I’ve ever made,’ she says, as shocked as I am, and in a very weak voice.
By now the security guard has arrived and is trying to stand between us, I’m frantically trying to get out the front door. Finally, he steers her slightly to the left, and I stumble out into the street.
My date flagged down a taxi and gently pulled me into it. I can’t breathe, I’m in a state of panic, and I’m absolutely desperate.
My actions have never come back to haunt me in such an openly humiliating way. Because you see, it’s one thing to cheat, but another thing to see for yourself the consequences of that reckless behavior.
But his actions come back to haunt him when the star’s wife approaches him at a bar
To this day I don’t know how he found out, or if they are still together, but that memory will haunt me forever.
So anyone feeling a little reckless and perhaps after a cheap thrill. May I suggest something far less harmful than a relationship, be it a one-night-stand or more. It can really come back to bite you in the butt. And no amount of sex can make up for the terrible karma that will undoubtedly come your way.
Oh, and it’s safe to say I didn’t get a second date with the hottie but I have no doubt she’s told the story a million times about the time she went on a date with a woman in red.
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