A new mum has revealed her husband spends hours waking up their sleeping baby to keep her asleep.
The woman took to British platform Mumsnet to explain that she does 90 percent of the parenting and sometimes it takes more than an hour to settle the baby.
She wondered if her partner liked watching her fight with the kid or if she was just ‘silly’.
Many rushed to the comments with some saying they would end the relationship.
The post read: ‘Dear hubby and I have a 5 month old who is not a great sleeper at all. I do all the bedtimes (and 90 percent of general parenting but I think that’s irrelevant).
A new mom revealed on MomsNet that her husband wakes up their sleeping baby by shouting around the house (stock image)
‘My trouble was again, when I had spent over an hour getting the baby to sleep, DH shouted at the top of his voice to ask me something.
‘It happens several times a week and it wakes the baby up. I am now trying to rehabilitate the baby while DH enjoys his free time downstairs alone, as he does every night.
‘If I don’t scream at him on the off chance that the baby doesn’t wake up, he screams again!
‘She says she yelled again if I didn’t hear or something happened to me?!
‘He doesn’t want to walk up the stairs for five seconds to check if me and the baby are already asleep, because that would probably be too easy.
‘He just shrugged when I explained how I felt. I even cry sometimes because I’m so tired and then I have a baby to fix everything again.
Mom said it’s happened so many times that she’s starting to wonder if it’s intentional.
He explained: ‘For context, this is the same man who, when the baby was three weeks old, went out for his hobby and when he got home at midnight, closed the front door and shouted ‘hello’ at the top of his voice. .
‘When I didn’t answer the first time because I had just woken up and was startled, she screamed again, waking me and the baby up.
‘It would have been really careless if I hadn’t texted him half an hour ago that I’d finally put the baby off, I was going to bed myself before it was time for his next meal and please come in quietly. To which he replied ‘OK, I will’.
‘I didn’t sleep that week because I had a nasty infection from the episiotomy and the baby had a horrible reaction to the antibiotics going into my breast milk, so we were trying to come back and get me and the baby. good
The woman took to the British platform to explain that she does 90% of the parenting and sometimes it takes more than an hour to settle the baby.
‘I’ve told him how I feel and basically everything I’ve written above but it never goes away.
‘I don’t know if she’s a complete moron or just doesn’t want to give me a break and likes to watch me struggle with the kid.
‘How do I deal with this?! Anything I can do to disturb his sleep might annoy the baby too so I’ll cut off my nose to annoy my face.’
Many have suggested that her husband is exhibiting ‘strange gaslighting behaviour’ and that she seems to be controlling.
One person wrote: ‘You texted him earlier to warn him of the need to be quiet and he still came banging on the door.
‘He’s gaslighting you and it’s pretty sick. How can someone be so stupid when they have already been told and told to shut up? It must be intentional..’
Another said: ‘I was going to say stupid until you said you texted him saying you were going to sleep and he still came up the stairs shouting hello. As previous comments stated strange gaslighting behavior.
‘I mean any normal person would care about even a stranger’s sleep and try to keep calm naturally, never mind your own wife and child.
‘I’ll hand him the baby and tell him to go put the baby to bed I mean you can’t do it without trouble!! Either that or you need to be more direct with him, calling people out sometimes. Straight ask him is he dumb? Or is he trying to mess with you.’
Many have suggested that her husband is exhibiting ‘strange gaslighting behaviour’ and that she seems to be controlling
Another agreed: ‘Holy shit it’s terrible!!! Faint and thoughtless, maybe, if he does it once… But despite requests, with explanations and continuing to cry is just willfully s***.
‘He’s either incredibly stubbornly self-centered and not happy*** refusing to adjust his behavior to make things better, or… he actually enjoys twisting the knife and beating you. Either way, it’s unbearably bloody cruel.’
A fourth wrote: ‘I agree its insulting – it’s coercive control, not even well hidden. I bet he doesn’t like being wrong, or being told what to do.’
Others suggested that she should not end the relationship soon because of her behavior.
One man said: ‘I would seriously consider ending a relationship over this and I’m a very tolerant person.’
Another wrote: ‘I’m telling you now… she’s mean and nasty. Don’t bother trying to pull her out of her behavior.
‘He knows exactly what he’s doing. Get out quickly with your baby!’
Another agreed: ‘I’m so angry with you. If you are financially independent, leave him and get child support. It can help pay for childcare from a responsible adult.
‘I cannot imagine a happy life for you or your children with this person. He’s numb.’
Some women suggested that she should settle the baby only if she woke the baby.
One said: ‘Why isn’t she fixing the baby if she wakes it up?
‘If it was me I’d go down and make him. He won’t wake the baby again I’m sure. Also, you should split the night 50/50 – why are you doing all this?’
Another wrote: ‘I’ll tell him the next time he does something to wake the baby up, once you’re asleep you hand the baby over to him for rehab.’
Someone else said: ‘Tell him to do it at bedtime, and he can be responsible if the baby wakes up. Bet he’ll stop yelling.’
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